


Jessie's Girl

by genneel



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Gen, Stanford Era, Trans Sam
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-06
Updated: 2015-09-06
Packaged: 2018-04-19 08:07:44
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,775
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4739015
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/genneel/pseuds/genneel
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"What are friends for, right?"</p>
            </blockquote>





	Jessie's Girl

Sam met Jessica Moore during the third week of her first semester at Stanford. She wasn't out of the closet yet, but she herself had come to terms with her gender identity and sexuality years before she even considered applying to the prestigious university. Sam was transgender and pansexual, both facts that she'd never dared to mention around other people. Although she lived in a very liberal location where many people would undoubtedly support her, Sam didn't feel emotionally ready to admit her secrets to others. Because of that, she accepted the male pronouns that were directed towards her, and she continued to wear masculine clothes, like the leather jacket and fitted jeans that she wore as she walked into Brady's friend's house with him on a Saturday night in September.

The music was already thumping loudly, despite the time being only ten p.m., but Sam didn't mind. In fact, she was appreciative. One of the many things about attending college that Sam loved was that she was exposed to music that she never got to hear when she was always surrounded by Dean and Dad. The classic rock was replaced by Destiny's Child, Outkast, and 3 Doors Down, which Sam developed a strong preference to quickly, not that she didn't still enjoy the genre that she grew up listening to, hence the Zeppelin shirt that she wore under Dean's old jacket. On the nights that Sam felt homesick, she often found herself listening to AC/DC or Aerosmith, both being bands that she found unique comfort in.

"Brade!" a bubbly blonde interrupted Sam's thoughts, striding over to the two of them with a smile plastered across her face. She was gorgeous; Sam took note of that right away. She had a friendly face, she was both busty and skinny, and she had a cute mole on her forehead. Sam already wanted to sit with her on the couch and talk about politics and her favorite films.

"Jessica!" Brady greeted. "This is my buddy, Sam. Sam, this is Jess. She's set on majoring in criminal law."

Sam quirked an eyebrow.

"Criminal law? Really?" she asked. Being in the early stages of college, Sam didn't quite know what she wanted to do with her life yet, but she did have the idea in her head that being a lawyer was incredibly boring. Granted, it was a much safer profession than the road that she had been taking with her family, but she couldn't see herself ever doing it herself.

"Why does everyone always react like that?" Jessica asked, twirling a strand of her curly hair. "It's not that bad, really. I come from a family of lawyers. They get to argue all day, and they make some serious cash. Who _wouldn't_ want to be a lawyer?"

She had a point. Sam just wasn't too keen on spending a substantial amount of time in school, as much as she loved it.

"What's your zodiac sign?" Jessica continued, gazing up at Sam expectantly.

"Taurus," she answered, albeit slightly confused at the sudden subject change, to which Jessica cocked an eyebrow and let out a low whistle.

"Y'know, according to the stars, we are totally incompatible. I'm an Aquarius. Our signs butt heads a lot," Jessica started, tilting her head as she did so.

 _Dean's an Aquarius, too_ , Sam mentally noted automatically. It made sense; Dean and Sam were almost always bickering about _something_ , despite the fact that they cared deeply about each other. Maybe there was truth to astrology, but Sam hoped not. That would mean that she would struggle to get to know the radiant personality that stood before her.

"I'm hoping that there's a but in that statement," Sam responded sheepishly, hiding in her bangs and looking down at her shoes, which she'd had since she was sixteen and she meant to replace when she actually had spending money. Needless to say, there weren't any perks in being disowned by her family.

"Duh," Jessica replied, causing Sam's cheeks to heat up. "Our signs aren't compatible, but I think I'm gonna let that slide for once. Hopefully, that decision won't bite me in the ass."

"It won't, Jess," Brady piped up, and Sam could only hope so. She was glad that Brady always felt the desire to defend and look out for her, though. In that respect, he reminded her of Dean. Sam supposed that that was the primary thing that drew her to him. "You two will get along well. Nerds always do. Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm gonna go get a drink."

With that, Brady gestured to the kitchen and left Sam and Jessica in the doorway.

"Do you wanna sit on the porch?" Jessica asked, nearly shouting over Missy Elliot's _Get Ur Freak On_. "It's really loud, and I kinda hate this song."

 _Thank God_ , Sam thought. She felt like she was suffocating in the tightly packed living room, and the song was practically drilling holes in her eardrums. Sam nodded and smiled gratefully, turning to hold the door open for Jessica as she crossed the threshold onto the porch, where only three couples were lounging.

"Such a gentleman," Jessica complimented, causing Sam to inwardly flinch as she followed Jess to the open couch on the far left side. She wished that there was a way for people to just know that she felt more comfortable being referred to with feminine pronouns, but she knew that that would never happen, so long as she continued to dress the way that she did and not react negatively to being called a man.

"So, how much does being a lawyer pay?" Sam asked as they searched for somewhere to settle. Jessica smiled at the question, her eyes brightening and crinkles forming at the corners of them.

"At _least_ $75,000 per year," she gushed, guiding Sam to the open couch towards the side of the porch that was furthest from the door. "You'd be set for life with that job, Sam. I'm telling you."

That sounded promising. Sam had lived a complicated and unsettling life prior to attending Stanford. Some stability was what she needed. It was the reason why she was there in the first place, after all.

"So," Jessica began once they sat down, facing Sam and turning the corner of her mouth up as she pondered whatever she was thinking about saying. "How about a round of _20 Questions_?"

"You're not gonna ask to see my junk, are you?" Sam found herself asking, making Jessica laugh. She liked the sound. It was gentle, yet natural, like Jessica herself.

"Absolutely not," Jess answered. "Where are you from?"

From there, they eased into a light banter, asking questions freely and discovering more about each other. Jessica was obsessed with Back to the Future and dogs. Her parents were both hippies and devoted Catholics, which certainly got a laugh out of Sam. She and Dean shared a birthday. She was a Palo Alto native, and it had always been her dream to attend Stanford. Sam told Jessica that she'd moved around a lot. She never really listened to pop music until she entered college. She had a brother and a father, both of which she wasn't that close to anymore, and her mother died when she was a baby. She desperately wanted to adopt a dog when she lived in an apartment and not a dorm. Everything was going swimmingly until Jessica asked a particular question.

"Why are you uncomfortable?"

It was a simple question with a really complex answer, and Sam didn't know how Jessica even _knew_ that she was uncomfortable, nonetheless how to respond to her. She wasn't nearly as uneasy as she usually was. Jessica wasn't asking questions that were strictly guy-oriented, and she hadn't misgendered her since she called her a gentleman. Sam guessed that she'd always feel slightly anxious as long as the people that she was surrounded by didn't know how she identified herself, which apparently manifested in her body language. Coming out was a foreign concept to Sam. For her entire life, she accepted it when people called her a guy and spoke about her as if she was one. Without a doubt, it would've been easier for her if she'd just corrected people and begun to transition years ago, but she hadn't. She often wondered if she was always going to have to feel like a stranger inside of her own body, and it seemed like she was, although Jessica was right there, offering a way for Sam to just admit the two things that always weighed on her. She was scared, though, rightfully. Queer people were constantly persecuted, and Sam didn't want to be one of them.

"What do you mean?" she asked, peering into the window as the party continued. It was well after midnight, but Sam suspected that it wouldn't be over until at least four.

"You seem a little nervous. That's all. You bite your lip and your body tenses every time I ask a question," Jessica said softly, pulling her legs towards her so that she could hug her knees. "I'm not gonna bite."

Sam hesitated for a moment while she weighed her options. She could lie and say that she was just cold or that she was afraid that she wouldn't get back to her dorm in time to study for the test that she had in three days, but Jessica was inviting and pleasant, and she didn't want to lie to her. It was a difficult decision to make, and Sam didn't have much time to make it, so she just spoke.

"Please don't laugh at me or tell anyone, but I don't feel like a guy, at least not inside, and I'm attracted to people of all genders. It's weird. I know. Not a lot about my life isn't," Sam blurted out in one breath, and she felt liberated. It wasn't just because she finally told someone about her inner pandemonium, but it was also because of the fact that Jessica's expression didn't falter in the slightest. She still seemed benevolent and joyous, and, most importantly, she seemed understanding.

"That's it?" Jess questioned, tittering. "I'm not gonna judge you for that, silly. I'm sorry for calling you a guy earlier, though."

Sam's eyes lit up, and she let out a breath that she didn't even know that she was holding.

"I know you didn't, and thanks for that. I've never come out to anyone before," she admitted. The corners of Jessica's mouth turned up, and she gently intertwined Sam's fingers with her own.

"What are friends for, right?"


End file.
